Anxiety in Children: How do I encourage my child to make friends?

Making friends causes a lot of anxiety in children

I received a question from a mother, all the way from the UK. She has written, asking, about her 11-year-old son who is moving from primary to secondary and he is not very good at making friends. So, how can I help him? I have five tips for you today…

1) Anxiety in children – how understanding his interests can really help. Find out about his interests. Is he interested in art, a particular sport or is he interested in music?

2) Enrolling in a class helps reduce anxiety in children. Whether it is an after-school class, an extra-circular activity, or just a private class. What will happen is, he will then go to that particular class which interests him and that will help him to focus more on his passion rather than the area of “making friends.” But, because he’s so focused on something he likes, it will be within a group environment, where, because he is following his passion, he will easily also make friends. So try that route.

3) Listen to the way he talks about his anxiety. Find out what he is saying, listen to him. Is he saying negative things like – “I’m not very good at making friends,” or “people don’t like me,” or, “I’m very shy?” Encourage him. Tell him to reverse his thinking mode and that is what I do with children in my Youth Coaching Program. I help them to learn to believe in themselves and their capabilities.

4) Different children enjoy different settings. What kind of child is he. Is he the kind of child who enjoys himself in a group setting, with a lot of children? Or is he the kind of child who enjoys one-on-one company?

5) Set up play-dates according to your child’s  preferences. So if he enjoys just having one friend over, call one person from his class or his group activity or the neighborhood and allow him to spend time one-on-one building a relationship. Or, if he is the kind of child who enjoys a group setting, where he likes to mingle with four or five people at the same time, then call a group of four or five children. So that he learns to build relationships, and friendships, in the environment that he is happy in.

Are you dealing with an anxious childJump on a free clarity call to understand how I can help you.

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So just to recap, the five points for today are:

Summary:

So just to recap, the five points for today are:

1) Find our what interests your child.
2) Enroll your child in that particular class, allowing him to follow his passion.
3) Listen to what your child is saying. Listen to his negative self-talk and convert that into positive self-talk.
4) Find out whether your child enjoys himself more in a group setting, or an individual setting.
5) Call his friends according to his likes, whether it is a group environment or an individual one.

So if any of you have anymore questions, with regards to children, or your own personal questions, do feel free to email me on sunainaathena@gmail.com or inbox me on Facebook: Athena Coaching Solutions or call me on (+971) 056 1399033.

Are you dealing with an anxious childJump on a free clarity call to understand how I can help you.

Link to: clarity call application form